Out

A guy called with an out. Part of my thought after the call, when thinking about the out was, "This is my last chance to get out." Without any delay, the Holy Ghost said, "You are already out."

Without any delay, I agreed. With the Holy Ghost.

I have become aware of how much this walk in the wilderness has effected me, but I had not realized that I was out. I am. Out.

There is nothing about my circumstances that I need to change, or get out of. I am out of my circumstances. They are still here, but I am not in them.

The only time my circumstances touch me is when I touch them, when I reach out to modify them by my personal ability. I am sitting adrift in a small boat on brown water with a steady slap of motion. If I dip my hands in to influence speed or direction, my hands get wet. In the mean time, for this to be worthwhile, I also have to look up to make the effort produce a desired effect. Just reaching in and pulling on the water is fruitless. I might be drawing myself in exactly the wrong direction. If I am willing to simply sit as I have been, the boat will arrive. Even then I am not obligated to look up and see where the journey has taken me.

I do not want to look up. I have found my focus. I have found the reason for my eyes, for my vision. My eyes draw me near to my beloved. And He embraces me.

Father, I trust You. It delights me to my center that I have found the definition of trustworthy.