39

April 7, and the temperature is 39F.  61F in the house.  I wanted to stay in the comforter all day.

I think I will.  I will stay in The Comforter.

One real comfort.  One real source of comfort.  One place to find satisfaction...and He DOES NOT MIND.

You don't tug on Superman's cape, but Our Father does not mind at all.  In fact he encourages it.  One of his favorite stories is about a woman who tugged on his cape and was instantly healed from a chronic debilitating disease.  

He had the psalmist write that there is one human desire that has a place above all others.  The ONE THING of Psalm 24:7.  One thing have I desired...You.  To stare in awe.  To weep at your beauty.  To be speechless in the face of your grace.  Dumbfounded...at the most fundamental level, unable and unwilling to say a thing because all expression is expressed in You.

I will stay in You today, Father.  Comfort and heal me.  Be glorified in us today.  Manifest your Kingdom in and through your bride today.  Rest your presence in great weight on the places where we call upon your Name today.  Shekinah Chabod.

Trust

Inadequate gratitude.  Yup.  Gotta be.

I find myself not trusting the goodness I see in my circumstances at the moment.  It is easy to manufacture a story that contradicts what I see.

My mind is too available to lies.  I am not busy enough recognizing grace and mercy, and expressing gratitude.  Ingrate!

I am not an ingrate.  I just do not have gratitude habits.  No.  I do not have adequate gratitude habits.

Enough analysis.

Daddy, thank you for loving me with the Blood of Jesus.  Thank you, Father for redeeming me from the mire.  Thank you finding me when I was not even looking for you.  Thank you for holding me while I struggle to prove you are faithless.  Thank  you for refusing to let me go back to my idols.

Thank you for flooding my life with things to be grateful for, so I can develop better and better habits of gratitude.

Thanks, Daddy.

Mean Pinball

Listening to Pandora.

I am here to write. Joanne said to just write is a success secret.
In this context, to just pray is the success secret.

I do not need to say anything. I need to listen to the Spirit and say what I hear.

We need to be provoked by the Spirit to rest ever more completely upon the trustworthy King.
I know this is true for several reasons, but the important reason at the moment is that it is entirely counter-rational and entirely intuitive. Now that is not the same as finding something irrational to do and calling it a mission from God. But if it is a mission from God, it will not make sense to the rational mind.

The opposing force is the being-restored soul. Habits of thought, feeling and action make for easy decisions that require no stillness and listening and obeying and trusting. Just rut walking.

The deeper the work of restoration, the greater the need of Christlikeness in the moment, the greater the shaking. It can feel...like anything, as long as how it feels can oppose the truth.

This is a dangerous God, fundamentally opposed to my plans and habits.

Father have mercy on us. We are not able to walk in your way without mercy that we will never be able to deserve. Yet once we have put our hand to your plow, we must walk in your way. No Spots, No Wrinkles. My cry tonight. Not wealthy, Not witty, Not even wise. One Bride. One Spotless Bride.

Gifts and Talents

There are things you are good at, things you are really good at, and then there are things that very clearly you are better at than you can be. When you are doing those things, you come alive with more than the enjoyment of doing something well. You come alive with the power of God coursing through you and doing well for his glory.

And all of this can happen without you having any regard for God.

The gifts and calling of God are irrevocable, and also are not dependent upon having received the good news of the Messiah.

There is a fair chance that the talent you have been given by your heavenly father will not be used for his glory if you have no regard for him. But the talent is still from him, inspires awe and reflects glory upon him.

Father, nothing you do is wasted. Perhaps what we do with what you do comes to ruin. But you will receive all of the glory. That has no variance. Now, what happens when we find the talent you have given, and we turn it all for the purpose you intended? Does it reflect your glory more? I hope so, but I am not sure. Or can we ever know the fullness of what you intended?

Maybe it is time to rest in the knowledge that, with the good heart you have put in me, that I will purpose and fail, and purpose and succeed, and purpose again, to do my best to love you with what I have and am. You have given me a good heart, and I will love you with it. It is you to have mercy on me. It is you to pass over my foolishness when you see me covered with the blood of Jesus.

O God, thank you for the Blood.

Glory!

I really must not really get it. There is so much mercy and favor, and I get may extra measure today, and do not believe it.

We must think that life in Christ is without adversity. I find myself disappointed. But it is in the adversity that the grace is both needed and available. I am not grateful for the adversity,but I am learning to be grateful in the adversity. I have to go back and look at that word. This is like getting slapped into alertness, it is such a rich blessing. My AWE is restored.

It is so much about a restored soul. I will let you, Father, walk me through to the place you want me to stand, and walk me from there to the next one. And I will praise until I worship, worship until your glory is manifest, and I will stand in your glory to reflect it upon you.

Hold me, Daddy. I am trembling. But not from fear or poverty or anger.

In a Box

It does not really matter how big the box is.

Keeping a box to hide in is the thing.

Describe the box to explain it away, to rational-lies the holding of it. "Well, it is only a ________ box, so it is not the kind you mean."

If the box separates the joints of the church, then God is opposed to it. Not me, just my box.

My box is made of pride. Other things to make it look different, "customized." But pride that says that I can construct a hiding place for my self that will be sufficient.

Then how come, pride, I feel, know, that my box is inadequate?

Because that is the work of the Spirit. Sure, I feel fear, but more, I feel naked.

This is primal stuff. I am not alone. Sure, this is my personal walk. It is just that everyone has one, too.

I guess everyone does not choose a box. What do they choose...when not choosing to trust Dad? As someone with a box habit, I will bet the alternatives look foolish to me.

Father, forgive my pride and habit of pride. I am not able to protect myself, and as long as I try, I can not give love. I want help getting out of the box. I want help abandoning the box and the box habit. I want to walk away from pride and the sin of self sufficiency. Most, I want not to go away from sin, but to walk habitually toward you and with you, leaning on you.

Please restore my fascination with you and my revulsion with pride.

Father, be glorified in your church.

Rest

What a treat to have a day of rest. Not about work to do, but to say no to anxiety. To say no to poverty. To say no to fear. To say no to picking up old baggage. To say no to striving for heaven. To say no to lovelessness. To say no to shame.

Thank you Father for wanting me. And thank you for wanting everyone else home enough to send your only begotten son to show us. Have mercy on the hard of heart. Bring us back to the moment of awe. To the moment we knew there was more.

The One Constant is Change

Wrong. The one constant is Christ. The only needed constant is Christ. Every other thing is on its way elsewhere. Back to the ashes and dust from which it was made. There is one thing that can be leaned on without fail: Christ. There is one unshifting anchor for the body, soul and spirit: Christ. There is one arm of one Beloved upon which the church can and must lean: The arm of Christ.

Thanks for the fruit tonight, Daddy. I got the chance to see and know. Thank you. Have mercy on us when we go to Egypt. Thank you that you made your church for us all to be a part of. Help us each day to find our part in the body of Christ.

Boy Full of Faith

My boy is uncomfortable in his momentary circumstances. At the same time, he knows he is going to be fine. He is okay. He has and is exercising faith. He will come out well on the other side of it.

Social discomfort is familiar to me. At the same time I realize how very much the Holy Spirit has balmed my wee soul. I know that there is a balm for the heart of the believer, and that there is more there than comfort. The healing is remarkable. Both worth talking about and worth giving thanks for.

There are still situations where I am lacking in grace. But...there is no lack of grace, and I am learning to access it.

How glorious is the mercy of our Father. To ponder my life of acts, and know that He will not turn from me. I look like His Son, sound like Him, smell like Him, when He puts His hands on me and pulls me close. The skin of a sacrifice has been placed on my neck and arms, so I feel like His Son. The clothing of His Son has been placed upon me, so that I smell right, just like the Son of His favor.

Father made it work out this way. He knows my frame, but he is distracted from His wrath by the Holy Perfection of His Son, in Whom He has hidden me.

Thank You, Father, for making a way for us to draw near and receive Your blessing.

I went adventuring with my King this weekend. I had two distinct opportunities to stay at home "on the porch" or go adventuring. In both instances, my soul said I should stay home, and my Lord said I should go out walking with Him.

Adventuring was better. And He kept me. So I am okay, and I am stretched by daring to trust Him. He said that He would never leave me nor forsake me.

Decisions of the magnitude made this weekend will never appear so big again. Now what will appear big, and will require leaning on the arm of my Beloved, will be the next arena for growth, and the next, and the next. Each marking parts of my life that I want to retain control of.

Father, I know there is a day coming when all of me is resting on and trusting all of You. I thank You for the promise of that day. In the meantime, thank you for each moments mercy, grace, favor, wisdom, patience, love, courage, and hope.

201010252238

Third Spaces: Public places where people are welcome to come, stay and associate.

1st Space is Home, 2nd Space is work.

Third Spaces is one of those things I have been thinking about and others have been as well. I found that I have been carrying a list of local Third Spaces for months now.

Today I had and took the time to go and sit. It was good. I am going back.

Some body said that it takes about six months for a new believer to shift and no longer have any unsaved friends. So how does the Gospel spread if Christ filled people have no real relationships with people who need Christ?

Receive Love and give Love away. Purpose. Difficult to fulfill without real relationships with those lacking Love.

It was good. I am going back. Thank you, Father, for dreams.

Room

You have to lean. That is the only price.

You have to admit that you can not do what has to be done, and lean on the One, the only One who can and did.

The words are, "The Blood of Jesus was, is and ever shall be enough and all."

I am smart, but not smart enough. I am strong, but not strong enough. I am not a bad looking human, but I can never be handsome enough. I am rich, but I can never have enough money to defeat the Wild. The only way I am coming out of this place is leaning on the arm of my Beloved.

Leaning everything.

God forgive my pride. God forgive the pride of your Church. Have mercy on her today.