I Love You

That's what He said. I like all the rest of it, but that is the part I have to have. That is the reason that I went looking for Him. I knew there was someone out there who could and would love me.

My wife loved me, but she did not complete me with her love. My sister and brother love me, but they do not fulfill my existence with their love. My son loves me, but as a son loves a father. A sons love is not meant to say "Amen" over my life.

That is Daddy's job. Dancing around me, singing over me, my Father looks at me and agrees completely, saying "Amen."

Father showed me a picture once, and over and over, of a day I needed Fathering. I was a little boy, and I was waiting on the front walk for my Dad to come home from work. I was expecting him to respond perfectly to my need that evening. He failed. Now keep in mind that my Dad was a great Dad. He did his best. But he was just a man, an earth father. That day I needed my Father in Heaven, because I always have and I always will. I am pretty sure it was not the first or last time he failed. It is just moment I realized that he never would meet that need, scratch that itch.

I am so grateful, Heavenly Father, that you knew I would come looking for You. Like the boy named Sue, there were lots of avenues to relief, but there was only one person who could be the door to AAAHHHHHH! My Dad could provide many things, but I needed You to redeem me out of darkness and hold me in Your Light. Thank you for the hunger in us that has only You for the answer.

Delight yourself also in the LORD: and he shall give you the desires of your heart.

Delight yourself also in the LORD: and he shall give you the desires of your heart.

For a long time I have thought about the two ways of reading that last clause. In the Word of Faith church, where I heard it first, it was about getting stuff. At least to a certain extent. Depended on who you were listening to. Made sense in that context, too. God loves me and gives me the things that I desire.

The other thought has been that, while I am in the process of delighting myself in the Lord, He will be in the process of giving me desires.

So lately, as the essential core of this walk in the Holy Wild, leaning on Christ, delighting myself with being with Him, practicing faith by clinging to my King, goes on, He has been teaching me to desire new things.

I know that I am a social guy, but for several months, Father has been showing me that He wants me to sit in public and drink coffee. There is no reason to expect that it is not about prayer, that I am not there to pray. I also suspect that it affords the opportunity, as well, to relate and to pour out Gods Love.

Did it today. There was a brand new kind of YES as a consequence, a fresh vision, like I got new eyes, and maybe new ears. Very Good.

Father, thank You for being available to delight myself in. Thank You for the rent curtain.

Buzzed Living is Drunk Living

On the other side of abandon is a life of wonder. The thing I like best is the "Yes" of God. The best way I can describe this is to ask you to imagine what it would be like if the God who loves you perfectly, and is the very fountain of life, tells you that He approves of you by wrapping you entirely in the splendor of His Love and kisses you on the top of your head. The effect of this embrace directly effects your nervous system and breaks down obstacles to the flow of information, sensation and ideation. You KNOW that you are alive, and you like it!

I like Yes. It makes the NO of God very tolerable. The embrace of Love changes everything. Father, thank You for loving me.