Fear is the Life Stealer

The current season is not over.  Duh.  It is the current season.  It can't be over.

The current season has progressed enough that there is opportunity to assess.  Assess the progress.  Assess the damage.  Assess the healing needed and the healing accomplished.

The assessment makes it clear that there was a lot of life lost, stolen.  And fear is the life stealer.  That is what fear does.  The present is filled up with possible futures.  The mind is pre-occupied, occupied in advance.  Wow.  And occupation is the operative term.  Forces bent upon domination have moved in and are dominating.

Wow.  Dominion.  Fear operating in my mind has been given dominion over a kingdom, in this case the kingdom of my mind and all that it is able to do. The gift of the organizing tools helps greatly to push the future out where it belongs, but that is not the same as saying "No!" to the fear that I have given permission to reign.

Yes.  We were given dominion over the earth.  Then we as a race gave the earth over to death.  But I and my world were purchased back from death, and death was even utterly defeated.  While I was dead, I developed habits of submitting to fear and death.  Now I am learning to see those habits and confess them. I have learned that this is a supernatural thing, and I need supernatural help every day to bring light to the dark places of my soul.  And to bring light to the dark places in the souls of my neighbors.


In the midst of this, as I am acknowledging how much has been stolen, I am reminded of how much was preserved until the day that dominion was returned to Christ.  As ever, you have been keeping me, even when I have been turning my back on you.

Father, thank you for reaching out and plucking me from the miry clay.  Thank you for washing me, robing me, ringing me (decorating me, making me peculiar) and shoeing me (telling me about my present and future), all while I am trying to tell you about the past.

Well, I guess that at any given moment I get to chose to listen to you telling me about my future, or I get to listen to fear.  I ask myself how I could be so foolish to have made / be making the fear choice, but that is where my habits are.  Father, help me form new life and light and love habits to obliterate the death ruts.

Fear is Awful

The only problem is that it is full of the wrong kind of awe. The right kind of awe is the fear of the Lord, the gasping speechless state of being incapacitated by the splendor of God. The wrong kind of awe, the awful kind rather than the awesome kind...well it was going to require me to meditate on it to be able to describe it, and I refuse.

God is good. Jesus loves me, this I know. For the Living Word tells me so.

There was a time when I ran away. Then there was a day when I bowed my head and said, "Okay, I am not running anymore. I need you." That has not changed. God, I need you. Like the flowers need the rain, you know I need you.

I need the Body of Christ. I needed to talk to a friend tonight, and saw how few I had to even consider. The guy I really wanted to talk to tonight died in the Spring.

Maybe I really wanted / needed to talk to that part of him that was the real reason I trusted him. What I wanted to say, I wanted to say to the Spirit. What I needed to hear, I needed to hear from the Spirit.

Take every thought captive. I guess I have just gotten out of practice. Recognize the voice as the enemy. Grab on tight and run toward Christ. The lies will wiggle away. The truth will remain. I'll end up facing the Love of my soul.

No darkness, no lies can stay there.

Gratitude Grows with Gratitude

Gratitude grows with gratitude.

It is good to remember a gift. It is better to remember and express thanksgiving. The gates of grace open wide.

How the nations do rage. There was never just one moment of refusing to say thank you. Longstanding patterns of habit. Cultural disinclination toward gratitude expressed to God. Habits of thanking the wrong god. Habits of thanking, congratulating self. Habits of uttering acknowledgement of a god as the source, without any personal knowledge of the truth, making the utterance a rut. So habits grow with habitual steps, digging the rut ever deeper.

After a while, even thinking about gratitude, therefore thinking about gifts to be grateful for,brings the life of God. Or brings me to the spout where the Glory comes out. Walking in pursuit of living water and gratitude for it brings life. Seeing where life is touching darkness brings vision for restoration.

My God, you are good!